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"i'm a bitch, i'm a mother, i'm a child, i'm a lover. i'm a sinner, but not a saint ... I've been where nobody else have dared. I am what no one dreamt of being.

Sunday, November 27, 2011

excited about New Year's Eve

And I am not actually referring to that one of the most awaited celebrations the world is always looking forward to.

I am talking about the  movie entitled "New Year's Eve" that is led by a stellar cast of actors, including Robert de Niro, Josh Duhamel, Katherine Heigl, Lea Michelle, Hilary Swank,  and Ashton Kutcher among others. Oh... and Jon BonJovi! *squeels here*

Based on the trailer, it follows in the tradition of past movies like Love Actually and Valentine's Day - intertwined lives of couples and individuals, this time it was set in the highly-loved and beautiufl New York city on Nea Year's eve.

What's excites me more is than Jon Bon Jovi was part of it. I've seen his past films over and over again since I came here in Singapore and the chance of seeing him on big screen again will be a treat for myself!

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

as the heart beats not

In bed, at dawn, I stare at your face
that's been hanging round my mind.

On moments when I drift away
I imagine you sitting by.

On nights, restless nights,
I reach out and see you by my side
so close I can feel you breathe
you heart beats loud,
or was it mine?

The rain invites me to dance with you
your smile is calling
The morning rays are like your arms
sheltering me, keeping me warm

But in bed, at dawn I would realize
you've just been hanging round my mind
for so long now that my memories swirl
so fierce that I've lost my desire to escape

But then on moments when I drift away,
when I see you sitting by?
I see your hand so close to mine,
your thoughts spinning, taking me to your heart

But I can't go and leave,
So please, let me just wait in bed

Sunday, November 20, 2011


I can't wait to close my eyes
and see you on that side
where we always talk like you know me
and I can stare at you, and let you be

There, I'd stay just to be near
With you I care less of my fears
In your arms I will find comfort
My heart will speak of no other

When 'morrow comes
when I have to open my eyes
know that it's your face that I'll remember
and I shall be waiting for later to come
so I can be with you, yet again

See yah later, Krueger!

I could have included vocalist John Molina's name in the title but it wouldn't rhyme. But be warned that there'll be lots of his name from this point on. Not for any reason other than he is the binding factor of the band's existence (as I see it, at least).

For some, it may appear to be that I am obsessed with the band since day one, with me uttering praises whenever I can, wanting to watch them at any possible chance I can have. Believe me but I have gone through the same phase with Bon Jovi, Mig Ayesa, and yeah, even Clay Aiken. But with this band, it's different. Probably so because they are within my reach.

One can probably see it shallow if I say that the band John Molina & Krueger plays a great part of how my stay here in Singapore becomes way bearable. Having to work thousand of miles away from my kids and family takes a huge toll on a person, moreso a mother, like me. It doesn't help being a bit, well, mature, to have it easy going out and enjoy the crowd. But I had a 180, one dull, August night when my friends and I decided to go out and de-stress. Details of which can be found on my first entry about the band.

Needless to say that for every nightout our group scheduled, or even think of, YelloJello will be the first name of place that will pop out. Not only for the relax ambience, but because of how we tremendously enjoy the house music, and how we have become accustomed to its regulat player, John Molina & Krueger. I have this same feeling everytime I go to any bar with Bamboo or Side-A playing. The time spent with their music is spelled F-U-N .

It matters a lot that three of them are Pinoys - Alfred, Boy, and John being a SG born and raised Pinoy. Sultan, the man behind the keyboard and Rizal, the percussion whiz kid are the two more people we always look forward to watch play.

fr. left - Rizal, John, Boy and Sultan

Boy, the excellent guitarist

Rizal on drums

vocalist John, all pumped up

bassist Alfred and Rizal

Listening to this band feels home. They make you feel at ease. In one way or the other, they make our every time spent there something to talk about in the days ahead. Their choice of songs are so in tune with the trend that even the younger crowd can sing with them to their delight. The classics, the old tunes that they sometimes include in the line-up are just the perfect 'down-memory-lane' for us, or me to be honest, who is somehow in the same age range as majority of the band members are.

They smile a lot, they kid with the crowd, they let everyone be in one with them. One readily fills up the other's weakness during performance. They are attuned to each other which makes simple mistakes and let down barely noticeable, especially to those whose ears are not so keen. Hey, every artist has their off nights right? They aren't superhuman. But nevertheless, they are performers who gives out 110% of their love for music, each and every night, six days a week, packed crowd or not. Actually, I kinda seem to enjoy them more on weekdays, when it is not too crowded, and the gang seem to be more relaxed, which somehow brings the "better best" in them, if there's such a thing.

Dancing with their music never fails to bring me to a different zone where I am 21 again, single, carefree, full of life. I can just sing and dance with them all night.

After the first time I watched the band perform, an idea for a novel sparked in me, left me outlining the story even when I am supposed to be working. It made me dream of it, breathe it and write about it more than I am supposed to.

At one point when we had a misunderstanding, a night spent there, singing and dancing mend everything, without uttering any word. If only every problem can be solved that way, then we will have a happier place to be in.

I may, at times, seem like addicted, for lack of a better term, of them. But that's just how I express my appreciation. I listen to every tune. I enjoy every song, I look at how each one of them play their instrument, I watch their every move, I check out their social media sites, and the list goes on. I am not a 17-yr old dreaming of becoming a groupie, never had, never will be. That's.just.how.I.show.my.appreciation. If and when I stop talking about them, delete any song that will remind me of them, never look at the pictures of the band I've taken - that's when I say I am through.

But I am far from that. Besides, I still haven't interviewed John for my novel. :)

So, two days ago, I've read that they are moving out somewhere else. And it made me sad. The same sadness I felt when Bamboo left Rivermaya, or when Bon Jovi decided to take a break, or when Michael Jackson died. So I head out tonight and celebrate, for the last time, the years of great performances they had at YelloJello. And what can I say?  .. it was f*$|ng great! Why, you asked?
Everybody was in tremendously high spirits/pumped up to the roof. Tthe crowd was wild, singing and dancing to every song. The drums are banging, the guitars riffs are lullabyes, the keyboards sounds like sax, the bass guitar beats along with your heart, their voicals are spot on. And ... and, John's voice reaches a new limit - that of Adelle's Rolling in The Deep.  (may I please request for Someone Like You, with me on the mic? just kidding!)


Oh, by the way, John took off his shirt, as he does everynight - NOT! So that became a cherry on top of everyone's strawberry milkshake. It's that sweet, nobody argued.

I felt nostalgic being there. Sad yet hoping, that come opening night of their new home, we will get to see the same warm smiles, the same camaraderie amongst them, the good old tunes that rock the house down and melt our hearts at the same time.

As they bid adieu to YelloJello, a new abode awaits and everyone is excited. I am excited! In two or three weeks time, John said. The sadness lasts only for a few weeks and we'll be having a good time again.

So, au revoir!

Friday, November 18, 2011

mumblings Nov. 18, 2011

Do you know?
That there's nothing I wouldn't do;
That there's not enough pain I can't take;
That there's no path I can't walk on
as long as I am holding your hand.

And I do know
that my mind's in shambles
and my heart's not with me
and I let myself wallow, be blue
since i first laid sight of you

But I choose to not be happy
if I'm not with you
I care not of tomorrow if I can't see you
I would leave this world for you

Would you?

Saturday, November 05, 2011

Bamboo ... Questions, no more.

News of Bamboo Mañalac going solo is something that many has probably expected as early as the time he left Rivermaya. But instead of doing so, he teamed up with also former Mayan Nathan Azarcon and formed Bamboo, the band. But it's just prologing the agony, yeah?

Now that he has decided to do it on his own, finally, people are more excited to see and know where the tides would take him. Like his namesake of a plant, is now back and rocking hard!

When Bamboo Mañalac came into the Philippine music scene in 1994 via the band Rivermaya, he immediately made a mark as the country's leading, most exciting and captivating vocalist. Who else can sing a mushy song and still be able rock your head or jump with your fist up high but Bamboo. And who can make us  sing life's angst, thru the anthemic Awit ng Kabataan and Noypi, without getting to the streets and start a rally?  Nobody, but Bamboo.

We first saw him as the scrawny, wide-eyed, skin-head and timid 16-17 yrd old (?) on the  release of Rivermaya, the album, in 1994. Though he was the vocalist, he chose to remain in the background during interviews and set breaks, letting his bandmates do most of the talking. He is a man of a few words, as they say. But once he step on the stage and grab the mic, he is transformed into a beast! His locks, girations and stage slides  is so lovely to watch you would want to jump on the stage and sing with him.  To borrow Mo Twister's words, "You're an animal!". He always gives out a solid, rocking and pumped up performance, even when he's just wearing cargo pants and slippers.

His husky, solid voice is capable to  give different takes on each song, may it be a cheesy Tagalog song as Ulan, or the political Mr. Clay, and even the funky Probinsyana.

As he embarks on a new phase in his music life, being a solo artist, Bamboo, now 34, is giving us a taste of what to expect from him with his haunting first single Questions. He is scheduled to launch his album No Water, No Moon sometime November. His hair has grown, which I love more, personally, and he's finally allowing himself to be heard - abount his plans, his background, his past, his music. Well, I should say he's being more outspoken, being a solo artist that he is now. And boy, he is very eloquent. Even when he is speaking, it feels like he is singing. His solo venture is promised to contain songs that somehow deviates from the usual band sound, giving us more instrumentations, and other facets of his range. Sounds exciting and something to really look forward to.

You can check out this podcast of one of his interview with  Mo Twister.