About Me

My photo
"i'm a bitch, i'm a mother, i'm a child, i'm a lover. i'm a sinner, but not a saint ... I've been where nobody else have dared. I am what no one dreamt of being.

Monday, October 17, 2005

as the writing goes on ...

Writing has been, and will always be, my passion. Be it may for a life-long dream of commercial release  (re: hoping to be recognized and be published) or just a diary-like piece, I have always put so much of my heart in my writing that I hope people would feel the emotions that I have as my fingers caress my keyboard. I wish "my readers" would be in the same dimension I was in, as I allow my hands to type words popping in my mind.

Though I admit that I am not as eloquent as other writers (or bloggers) are, I make up for this "deficiency" by making my writing as vivid and imaginable as I can. I try to level up with what I presume to be  my intended readers' experience and interest. I write what I feel. What I write, I am.

I try to come up with a funny tale but I always end up on a serious note. I try to passionately write about someone I adore so much (as of this weiting, it would be MiG Ayesa and Clay Aiken) but they almost always go to my draft list. This happens when I feel I am not making any justice in revealing the depth of my appreciation.

As it is for others, blogging (or writing .. dang! they seem to be appearing along side each other too often!) is my way of releasing anger, pain, happiness, triumph, boredom, love, anticipation. Yeah, mostly about anything. They are mostly my private thoughts which I want to share (then makes them not private anymore, right?). What I haven't tried, but so anxious of doing, is to write about my fantasies - date, lines, movie scene, sex position, place to have sex, have sex with ... argh! Where did that come from?

Honestly speaking, I haven't ventured out to speaking anything about sex. My stories on sex are safely tucked in the deepest part of my brain. But I tell you, they are much eager to be unleashed as that lion that attacked Roy! But I am getting there *smirk.

This post is more of raving (and ranting on the side) of what I love doing and miss of doing more - writing.

I just hope many would be able to visit my blog and know me thru my writing.

Song of Longing

How can I cry when I should smile?
How can I ask for a hand when nobody's insight?
One can only think how hard it could be
to put up a front, and just let it be.

I wonder how, in cold lonely nights
can I last till dawn and still manage to laugh.

I often think how, in warm summer days
can I stand the longing of being away
from the one I treasure, I adore?

How then can I muster words of hope
when even my heart feels the fading faith?

Will tomorrow be better?
Will my faith bid it's adiue?
Or will my beaten heart clings for its last breath
and fight to start anew?

I wonder then, when the sun'll shine bright.
When even the moon'll shed me some light.
My heart longs for the warm nights
When I can lay my sleepy head by your side.